As i think of all the mistakes ive made with my relationships in the past, i hear a song i havent paid too much attention to in the past and the feelings now make sense. Too bad things couldnt be better now, maybe someday when we realize all the bullshit wasnt so bad:

Farther - Third Eye Blind

"Nothing much matters to me so I don't see why
I should hold so tightly to a memory that I can't speak of
Ithink about it nightly how you opened up your life for me
Why are you still lonely?
Though I'm not the type who begs
I'm thinking how you'd open up your legs
But I'm farther from you every day
And a woman talking to herself gathers up the shit she couldn't sell
Chances don't bode well tomorrow
and Talking to myself pass by, I miss you but not the face you make Like when you found me out for the fake I am So easily you see through me
What do you do to me to make me treat you so bad?
I keep hoping that you'll speak to me But I'm father from you every day
All I think about is waiting and the people we are fading into
There was a sound but I don't know how it goes
There was something we went through, blew in from the coast
You said, you are of the earth, I am of the sky I don't even know what the hell that means Father from you every day
All I think about is waiting and all the people we are fading into
And I think about you dying years from now never having known Who you are
Farther from you everyday